سوال

I want to know the Islamic ruling on the custody of children. My wife is seeking khula, and we have two daughters aged 10 and 7.

اَلجَوَابْ بِاسْمِ مُلْہِمِ الصَّوَابْ

It is to be noted that in the event of a Sharīʿah-compliant separation between husband and wife,whether by way of ṭalāq (divorce) or khulʿ (mutual dissolution of marriage),the right of ḥaḍānah (custody) belongs to the mother for a male child until the age of seven, and for a female child until the age of nine.

In the present case, the daughter who is 7 years old shall remain in the custody of the mother until she attains the age of nine (i.e., for a further two years). However, the daughter who has reached the age of 10 shall, by default, fall under the custodial right of the father.

Nevertheless, if the father consents, or if there is a preponderant presumption (ẓann ghālib) that he will not be able to adequately undertake the child’s tarbiyah (upbringing) and care, then even after the lapse of the prescribed custodial period, the children may remain in the custody of the mother in view of their best interests.

الدر المختار (566/3):

"(والحاضنة) أما، أو غيرها (أحق به) أي بالغلام حتى يستغني عن النساء وقدر بسبع وبه يفتى لأنه الغالب. ولو اختلفا في سنه، فإن أكل وشرب ولبس واستنجى وحده دفع إليه ولو جبرا وإلا لا (والأم والجدة) لأم، أو لأب (أحق بها) بالصغيرة (حتى تحيض) أي تبلغ في ظاهر الرواية. ولو اختلفا في حيضها فالقول للأم بحر بحثا.

وأقول: ينبغي أن يحكم سنها ويعمل بالغالب. وعند مالك، حتى يحتلم الغلام، وتتزوج الصغيرة ويدخل بها الزوج عيني (وغيرهما أحق بها حتى تشتهى) وقدر بتسع وبه يفتى. وبنت إحدى عشرة مشتهاة اتفاقا .